Nope, That’s Not a Compliment

As I tell my children, “THINK before you speak. Is what you’re about to say True? Helpful? Inspirational? Is it Necessary? And, is it Kind? If not, keep your pie-hole shut.”

Dances With Fat

Reality and PerceptionFat people get a lot of negative messages about our bodies every day. One way to fight this is to change the number of positive messages. Unfortunately I’ve found that some people don’t know the difference between an authentic compliment, and saying something really offensive. It’s cool though, I’m here to help.

Allow me to elucidate using personal experience from a meeting to which I wore a sleeveless shirt and a skirt (and where I typically wear pants):

“Look at you, rocking a dress!” (said positively, no hint of sarcasm).

Compliment.  Well done. (Yes, it’s technically a skirt and not a dress, but that’s not important right now.)

Oh (makes pensive face), I didn’t think you wore dresses.  I actually think pants suit you better.”

Nope, not a compliment.  Not a thing to say at all really.  Maybe should have used your inner monologue on this one.

facepalm

“Wow, I don’t think I’ve seen…

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